She emasculated me!
She emasculated me!
Chris, 27 years old.
Cried to me over the phone.
“My heart is in pieces. I miss her so much. I love her dearly.”
“Who?” I asked.
He met this special girl, Lily.
They hit it off right away.
Went across the country-
To attend a friend’s wedding
Chris has never spent 15 days straight-
With any woman he dated.
At the same time-
He’d developed a chronic muscle weakness-
Where he didn’t feel well enough…
To last “long” enough in the bedroom…
It really hit his confidence.
As his muscles deteriorated, sex became very exhausting.
“I fucked things up completely. I got into an argument with Lily over something stupid.”
When one day..
He got irritated when-
Lily suggested that she wanted to bring her sex toy…
Into the bedroom…
Chris had been with too many women to count..
He got frustrated that..
He wasn’t able to satisfy Lily.
“I tried so hard to please her. She was emasculating me that she needed her toy!”
He was angry.
He was frustrated.
He was physically exhausted.
He felt he wasn’t good enough for her.
He felt she’s no longer present intimately with him-
If she needed her toy.
“I tried every move. I felt defeated. So I got up and left.”
They broke up.
Then I asked him..
“How’s your parents marriage?”
Wait for it.
It turned out..
His parents were divorced.
He had witness toxic behaviors from his parents when he was a child.
He didn’t know how to be in a healthy relationship.
He didn’t know how to resolve a conflict..
Falling in love was not part of the plan.
It took him out of his comfort zone.
The only way he knew how-
Was to push her away…
Was to sabotage it…
“Please, I will do whatever it takes to win her back.”
He cried with remorse.
Lily left because that was NOT the first time he raised his voice at her.
Lily honored her own sexuality.
Lily refused to tolerate his anger issues.
She didn’t emasculate him.
HE emasculated himself.
In his mind..
In his perceptions..
In his interpretations..
Of the event.
Remember, my loves
“When we change the way we look at things…
The things we look at change.”
～ Love you more ❤️