How To Get Over A Breakup? - Kolline Lee Coaching

How To Get Over A Breakup?


How To Get Over A Breakup? It doesn’t matter if you broke up with the woman you were dating or she initiated the break up; the pain is excruciating. Watch this video to learn these 6 steps of the break up process to ensure you allow yourself the space to reflect and rebuild what you may have lost in the relationship


Hi guys-

I get it. It doesn’t matter if you broke up with the woman you were dating or she initiated the break up; the pain is excruciating.

You are hurting inside but as a man you feel you need to put on a brave front and move on right away. Stop- let’s follow these next 6 steps of the break up process to ensure you allow yourself the space to reflect and rebuild what you may have lost in the relationship.

The loss can feel like death sometimes but remember, thoughts create reality, so let’s try to stay objective and think positive thoughts during this process of “reinventing” yourself!

#1 Honor the decision

It doesn’t matter who initiated the break up, or if it was mutually agreed upon. Honor the decision by accepting it to help you start the healing process faster. The sadness, disappointment, hurt or pain of going through a breakup is just as uncomfortable to her as it is to you. You need to understand that both parties will need to detach physically and emotionally to start moving on to the next chapter of your lives. Accepting the decision is the first important step toward healing.

#2 Take your power back by walking away completely

Please respect there should be a cool off period so both parties can detach from each other. The longer the relationship was, the more time may be needed for the healing process.

Take the time you need to heal so you won’t be tempted by a rebound or a temporary setback of getting back together. Thus, detach from your ex completely by applying the “no contact” rule for 30 days (no text, no social media, no talking, etc.) so both of you can reflect to gain deeper insights as to why the relationship didn’t work.

The no contact rule helps you propel forward with your life so you won’t continue wasting time on a woman who clearly wasn’t compatible with you. When you still have lingering feelings toward her you won’t be able to reinvest in yourself.

#3 Embrace your feelings:

Men have been conditioned since a young age that boys should be strong and not cry. I want you to know this limiting belief is actually working against your healing process.

I want you to think back to times in this relationship and identify any incident that made you FEEL: anger, guilt, sadness, resentment, disappointment, disempowerment, shame, rejection, undesirability and/or hurt.

You can release these negative emotions by feeling them while you do prayers or meditations to heal, forgive, and move on. You can also compile a breakup playlist with songs you shared together, or other breakup songs to help you release those emotions by either singing alone and/or just crying it out loud.

#4 Stay true to your authentic self

After you have done some emotional clearing, the next step is to stay true to your authentic self and make a list of positive things you learned about yourself from this relationship. The process of turning negative aspects to positive learning is necessary so you can reiterate the values of what you are looking for in your soul mate.

For example, the woman you were dating seemed more interested in her social media accounts than she’s interested in you since she could never put her phone down around you, no matter how many times you fought about it. You realized that in your next relationship, you want a woman who can give you her undivided attention. You learn what you value most- in this case, is undivided attention.

This realization also teaches you what you desire and won’t tolerate in your next relationship. Thus, while you’re moving on, you’re also staying authentic to what your values are. This is how you turn negative experience into positive learning.

#5 Get support from “supportive” friends and family

While you are going through a breakup focusing on rebuilding your life, what can help you is to get the support that you need from friends or family. When you’re surrounded by supportive positive people, you won’t feel as alone, and can move on faster. This is also a good chance to spend some quality time with your friends and family.

#6 Reinvent yourself

This is a fun and creative process. I want you to have an abundant mindset and know that there are 7.8 billion people in this world and your soul mate is somewhere out there waiting for you. Can you visualize that? Every wrong woman you move on from is another step you are taking toward the right woman!

How do you get yourself ready to attract the woman of your dreams? Let’s start by listing out the things that you want to learn or accomplish to be the best version of yourself. For example, you want to take a zoom class on personal development or improve your physical health by running daily.

The point is, dedicate your focus and time back to yourself so not only can you heal and move on, you can become a more attractive man by learning and acquiring new things.

I hope you enjoyed this video on the various breakup remedies and steps you can take to come out a much more attractive man. The key is while you are healing, you are also focusing on unlocking the love you have within yourself so you can be a better man.

As always, I love you more.

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